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Profile: Roots of Empathy
It's amazing to think that one little baby could change the world. Of course it's not quite that simple, but at the heart of the Roots of Empathy (ROE, Suite 160) program is that very idea. Through a guided interaction with a baby and its family, children are shown how to become compassionate individuals who instinctually turn to empathy instead of
aggression to deal with the trials and tribulations of life. They are not only taught what empathy means, but shown how it feels. Roots Founder and President Mary Gordon has spent her life cultivating this idea from teaching, to building parenting centres, to creating an organization who's sole purpose is the creation of a civil society one child at a time.
Roots of Empathy is an evidence-based classroom program that has shown dramatic effect in reducing levels of aggression and violence among schoolchildren while raising social and emotional competence
and increasing empathy. An evaluation done in 2002/03 showed a sixty-one per cent decrease in relational aggression among children who participated in the Roots program -- compared to a sixty-seven
per cent increase in children who didn't participate.
The program has been proven and there is no question of its effectiveness so the job now is to reach as many children as possible. This involves support from provincial government to bring the program to local schools. ROE trains instructors who can go to the school and work with the children over the course of the school year, twenty-seven visits in all. The teacher is an important player in the program, not that they teach the program, but by participating in the program they carry the messages of Roots of Empathy through all the other work they do with children.
When we met with Mary she painted us a picture with a story that speaks to the heart of what the program is all about. She had just been told a story about a ten year old boy in the program whose class had been working on the theme of sleep where they spent time talking about "transitional objects," aka the blankie. This theme is used to talk about how everybody gets worried sometimes when they are going to sleep and these objects can be helpful, they're not something to be ashamed of.
As Mary explained, "because there's a culture established in the classroom of respecting one another and never making anyone embarrassed or ashamed, this little boy spoke up and said "I have a transitional object." The children were listening and he said "my grandpa died two weeks ago and my grandma made me a special pillow out of his shirts and I hug it every night and I know I'm with my grandpa and it helps me not to be sad." He hadn't even told his mother this, but he shared it with his class. When there is trust and social cohesion in the classroom, children are able to cultivate civility. They have the chance to be a person, to understand and not be ashamed, to find their own humanity. And if they find humanity in themselves, they'll find it in the other.
When I was a little girl, if I had told a story like that I would have been humiliated, mocked, and teased. My goal is to try and demystify all the false walls we build trying to pretend we don't have the feelings we do. What Roots of Empathy does in essence is cultivate emotional literacy, authentic communication, and emotional integrity. You don't have to
lie and be ashamed about who you are - you can celebrate and enjoy others because it's these vulnerabilities that make us delicious."
We have spent many years together watching Roots of Empathy grow from a small operation at 401 Richmond to a bustling office at 215 Spadina with an ever-growing staff that is evolving to address the new needs of the enterprise. There is now someone to handle development and a designated person to assist people interested in doing research on the program. We have been fortunate enough to have a first hand connection with the history of the organization that was founded in 1996 and it seemed fitting at this juncture to talk to Mary about what the future holds for Roots of Empathy.
Mary is organizing an umbrella organization to handle her consulting and speaking engagements as well as the new programs and development into new countries. One such program is Seeds of Empathy, what Mary refers to as ROE's younger sibling that is being brought to three to five year old children in child-care settings. The groundwork of emotional literacy, authentic communication, and emotional integrity is now being set even earlier, giving these children the best chance possible of becoming caring adults. Also high on Mary's list of priorities is continuing her work with Aboriginal children. As she explains, "we're trying really hard to learn how to be most helpful to aboriginal societies and I have a commitment to help those children because of the outrageous third world
circumstances they endure in this country. You can't just charge in -- you're not saving anyone. It's about working side by each and figuring out how to do that respectfully."
Mary is heading to a sweatlodge on the Six Nations Reserve so she can "be with to learn." Mary puts into practice the very principles that guide her programs in the classroom and child-care settings. She is a firm believer that "instruction is a lousy way to learn. It's efficient, but the least effective way. Everything that I have done is based on experiential learning, engaging the heart and the mind because unless it's experiential you don't have the complete engagement of all our human capacities." This happens to be what the Dalai Lama likes about the work Mary is doing -- a complete engagement of the mind and the heart to change the world.
Photo captions:
Top: Roots of Empathy Founder and President Mary Gordon
Middle: Baby Henry visits a classroom as part of the Roots of Empathy program
Bottom: Roots of Empathy program in the classroom